On average 13,000 people are killed per year due to alcohol related accidents. In Minnesota one year there were 131 deaths and in Wisconsin 251 deaths. These are not just numbers, these are not just statistics, these are 13,000 people who once had great lives surrounded by people who loved them and who now mourn for them. My aunt Christine Flaherty is someone worth honoring and remembering in a big way. Christine is not just some number, she was like a second mother to me and it kills me to know that she someday may only be a statistic in a book. Chrissy’s laughter was infectious; her smile warm, inviting and her heart was the best beyond a question of a doubt. It would be an honor to be half the person Chrissy was.
Chrissy was born April 28th,
1983. Our birthdays were only one day apart and she made sure that our
birthdays were a special time to share with each other. It was always
double the fun and double the trouble because she made sure it was a great
time. I remember when I had turned seven years old at my own birthday
party and I was begging Chrissy to take me away from it all so that I could
just go spend time with her and have a sleep over. I always wanted to be
with her or going to my papa’s house to hang out with her. First it would
be agreed with my parents that I could spend a Friday night with her and we
always had a plan and act for extending our time together and sometimes I would
end up staying with her for an entire week. The time together would be so
special and fun and I would always want to stay longer.
Chrissy made absolutely anything that we did so much fun, going to parks, swimming pools, baking cookies she always made it so much fun. These were some of the best times I have to look back on. I am almost positive that every time that we were together we would make cookies, chocolate chip to be exact. One time in particular sticks out in my memory... It was just me, Tom and Christine. I feel it is necessary to share insight on who Tom is since Tom and Chrissy had been together since they were very young. Their hearts had played a perfect beat that was in sync. They were perfect and he was just like her in that he was selfless, loving with the perfect balance of sarcasm and ability to laugh. Almost 16 years of being together and yet separated at the young age of 28. Yep, you do the math; they dated since they were in 7th grade.
But back to those cookies, we
started the baking off with a huge gushy package of Pillsbury cookie
dough. But when the time came to put the cookies on the sheet, we only
had half the dough left. Even though Chrissy did her best to fend me off
from the cookie dough, it was pointless. With what we had left, we made
one single giant cookie. Even though there were only three of us, that
cookie was gone faster than a track runner after the starter gun is
fired. This whole cookie routine turned into somewhat of a
tradition. It was just one of the ways Christine made it a fun time that
brought us all together. But for me it wasn’t the cookies that brought us
closer but Chrissy, she had a way that made people love her and gravitate
toward her compassion. Never in my life have I seen more people at a wake
or funeral as people were packed shoulder to shoulder like people who have lost
their way and are looking for answers. The problem is the answers are
dead because when Chrissy left, so did the amazing wisdom and advice that she
provided and helped so many people through difficult and challenging
circumstances. God truly gave Chrissy a gift of being able to be a good
listener and never pass judgment. She would only give advice that you
would end up cherishing because you knew she loved you too much to ever steer
you in the wrong direction. Christine incorporated this in her personal
and professional life. She utilized this gift at her job working with
children and young adults who had committed crimes and made mistakes in their
life. Chrissy knew that they were not bad kids at all and that they only
lacked parental direction, care and guidance. She gave them all of this
and Christine became what they saw as a role model and mother like figure that
they never had in their life. Christine would have made a great mother,
it was her passion to be a mom one day and she almost had the chance to be a
mom that everyone would dream of having. Everyone was thrilled of the
thought of her being a mom because we all knew that she was more than prepared
to live that dream. Not long after the news of her pregnancy, I was with
Chrissy again, but I knew that something was wrong because her bubbly character
was gone. Later in the kitchen of her home, she shared with me the words,
“Halle, I lost the baby.” The last words she could barely speak as she
told me and before I knew it I was in her arms trying to comfort her, but she
was the strong one, the one that always comforted others¸ she certainly did not
deserve the pain of miscarriage and neither did Tom her fiancé. Chrissy’s
strength through this major life difficulty was very inspiring, as she was so broken
yet I only saw her strength falter this one instance, she continued to push
forward and be the bright spot for others who were hurting on a daily
basis.
I only hope that if ever faced
with such a difficult life obstacle that I would be able to handle it the way
she had. Shortly after this tough time, Chrissy accepted Toms marriage
proposal and they were in the planning stage of getting married in the
Bahamas. Chrissy loved the ocean and she loved and cherished the fun that
she could have in the beauty that the ocean is. Once we had gone on a
trip together to Florida and we traveled with our family and her fiancé’s
family along with Tom’s baseball team. One day at the beach, Chrissy had
noticed how the water was so shallow and that it went out like what seemed
forever very shallow. Chrissy was fearless and despite my fear of the
water, she continued to take us out farther and farther until we must have been
more than a half of a mile out. We stayed out there for an hour or two.
I don’t remember because you forget about your fears, as time passes or worries
that you may have because with Chrissy I just knew with someone this great by
my side and in my life that nothing in life could be too difficult to deal
with. Chrissy taught me that there is no point in life if you don’t live
it to the fullest. She is the strength, the laughter, the ability to joke
around, the ability to listen, and to give the absolute best advice.
Inside of me, so much comes from her and the example she set for me to observe
and cherish. Being able to witness all of her great qualities in action
that led so many people to love her so much makes me want to strive harder to
be someone like her. I was honored when Chrissy called me and after so
long of me teasing them about getting married that they were finally going to
tie the knot. I was so excited and didn’t think beyond hearing that news
that there could be anything that could make me happier until next Chrissy
brought me to complete tears when she asked me if I would stand as her witness
at the wedding and be her maid of honor. It was going to be a smaller
intimate wedding and I was so ecstatic that someone who does nothing for
herself and always for others that she was planning the wedding of her dreams.
It was like the sun was shining and only staying on my family and then like an
unexpected treacherous storm came over us and our shining light, Christine was
gone. On her way to work at 8:27 am on June 25th, 2011 a 19
year old drunk driver fell asleep on the road hitting Chrissy head on and she
had no time to react. She was killed instantly with other driver only
suffering minor injuries. That was it, she was gone forever and it was
just two weeks prior to that that I was crying with joy with excitement about
being a part of her upcoming wedding that was to take place in September.
Now I could only sob because I would never see my Aunt, best friend and second
mother ever again.
Chrissy showed me how to have fun in
life and we share the deepest memories of laughter, tragedy and times we will
never forget but I always looked forward to the next memories we could create
together.
The most prominent lesson I will
keep with me forever is to always enjoy life to the fullest and always laugh,
cry less and love with all your heart to anyone who needs it. Just like
my aunt Chrissy did.
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